i know i can, i know you can

BOOO! i'm putting aside some time to blooog! hee. Exams are reaching in a few days time and had been studying for straight 5days! from morning/noon to night(: tired but really finding joy in whatever i do. DD has officially became my best study partner! we don't stress each other out during revisions instead we made things enjoyable for one another. its my first time that i don't feel stress for exams. haha. have been laughin so much recently, to the extent that i cant pass a day without smiling. haha. so INSTATS, INSTEV&POA.

Not really having very high expectation for myself. BUT at least i know i've put in all my effort in studying. yupp! Rather worn out recently but i'm gonna persevere. i know i can! JIAYOUS JIAYOUS!:D To all BZSE-ians, jiayous and study hard! dont forget to get enough rest yaa! Just hang in there, its all gonna end real soon(:

p/s benben, i know u wouldn be reading this but i sincerely wish you all the best in your singaopre dance delight competition! cant be there physically but will be with you mentally. *ahpiao* haha. jiayous(: i believe the results does not matters that much. what really matter is the process and experience gained. Remember last year? we were the audience of SDD. and noow. u're the contestant! i'm really proud of you(: hee. keep that passion of dance in you and continue striving! u have my support no matter what! JIAYOUS(:

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One of my deep thoughts

Reason being why i didn take any step in making close friends in poly is because i don't see myself as a good friend. i can't hold more than one commitment. i go around hurting and neglecting those around me and till now, i can't afford to go on further doing this to more people. People may tell me,"oh nooo, you are really good". then all i can say is stop lying to me and yourself. either that, you're not close enough to know what i mean.

i hate the fact that whenever i take a break from things, i find myself staring in blank space. thinking about what kind of person i am. i tried imagining how it would have felt if i were them, and indeed it felt terrible. but.. still i'm not doing anythingg. i wouldn't say "i dunno what to do", "i can't do anything about it" etc. cause its all...excuses. i stop using phrases like,"i will be by your side". i know it clearly for myself that i can't be by someone side 24/7, buut as long as i know i can i will try.

Whenever i thought of turning to someone to share my joy or sorrow with, i hesitate. of course i have my awesome bf with me. i know that(: what i'm referring to is, other than him.

i find myself struggling to open to people around me noow. i mean, really difficult. whyy? in the past, i was deliberately trying to keep things away from others. Now, it just happen so naturally.

its a blessing for me to have friends who are still by my side after 3 years. and only one special friend ever stayed. she is rolinda also known as my dajie(: She have such forgiving character, she forgive me for whatever i have done wrong. if it was others, they would have scolded me and left me long ago. i'm sry and thankyou.

i dunno if my doings are right but its going to be for the well-being for my friends too. okayy, emotional post but feeling so much better after dumping my thoughts here. actually, i miss everyone. off to bed. byee.

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IMY!

Handmade friendship band from Cambodia(:

This is something very significant for me(: and will always be! it has been on my hand since the day kern put it on for me(: Whenever i feel dishearten or helpless, i will just have to look at this band on my hand. it brings me hope. haha. don't ask me why, i dunno either. just that i remember their smiles and encouraging words. so heartwarming. i mean, instead of us teachin them and bringing hope in their lives, it was the other way round. they touched our hearts(: most of us, i believed. i really cherish this friendship band and still think of them very often. especially kern. talking about kern, i really miss her alot! wonder how is she now. do she still remember me? or.. does she just see me as those students on study trip trying to keep them accompany for that few hours. i really wonder. i wonder if she still remember the conversation we had. i wonder if she remembers what i told her. i wonderr... umm.really hope she is doing fine there!(:

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V-day(:

For whats up on Valentine's day, i shall let picture do the talking(:

SMILE:D

Wishing tree(:

ILOVEYOU:D

Thanks for all that you've planned that day. really appreciated it and really happy(:

DD, you know what? With you around its Valentine's day everyday(:

HEE. WOAINI!:D

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(:

HAPPY SISTERHOOD DAY!:D heee. iloveyoudajieee! we shall take more pic when we have our next meetupp!:D

BLOGGY(: yay! Submitted social psych report todayyy! left with video making! muahaha. Should really start studying for my upcoming exams. whosh. busy busy. Meeting DD for study date tmr:D HEE. hope it will be a productive one tmr! lala. shall get back to my work nooow:D

Maybe its time to apply what we're taught.

p/s HELLO READERS:D do my a favor will you?(: PLEASE help me to click on the nuffnang adv on my left <------ hahah. XIE XIE:D thankyooou!(:

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Appreciate what you have to feel contentment.

HI!:D i'm here to blog. yayay. so done with POA presentation& i kinda screwed it up. so yeahh:/ ohwell, but since its over, there is nothin much i can do. Shall just learn from my mistakes, to prepare earlier. (but i was really tired:x) Now, we're left with social psych project before we start to prepare for our exams. ohman. haha. Hope i will be able to cope well!

So, headed to DD's workplace after school; funfair:D its a great great world:D So yupp, helped out alil. and i felt really happy when i see those kids enjoying themselves. it touches my heart to see them smiling so widely. aw. hahaha. Why are they all so adorable? Why are they so easily contented? They can spend 30minutes jumping inside some (i dunno what you call that, its like a mini playground but its formed only when air is pumped in.) and still feel so reluctant to leave afterwards. haha. When interacting with them, i cant help but to keep smiling, i mean who can resist those innocent yet cute replies from them? haha.

Hmm, conflicts, misunderstandings, blah blah. i really hope one day everything will be cleared& bonds will be created again:/ like what i hope 2011 to be, a year full of acceptance:/ if only i have the ability to help.

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to APPRECIATE

ok.. soooo the picture above kinda says it all. yes, tons of things left undone. No point looking forward to the end of project, because it just mark the start of mugging for exams. hhaha. But still i'm learning to find joy in everything i do. i want to enjoy what i'm doing so i wouldn waste any second of my life. yesss, i want to live life positively and i'm making an effort to do so. haha. claps for myself:D Social psych class is cancelled tmr, to rejoice or not??:X Cause i kinda enjoy Ms Heidi's class. haha.

Soo. deadline for social psych project is nearing and i've yet to carry out my interview. ahlemak. haha. hope i can complete it on time. My energy is running out pretty fast recently. feeling so drained all the time. haiyo.

So, anw went to one of my relative's house today and WOW.you know, its kinda hard to get me to really envy someone or smth bt when i step into their house, i felt nothing except for an overwhelming feeling of envy. their house is so bigg. ok, maybe its just me. i yet to experience and see alot more things out there. haha. but back to where i was, they have piano, own rooms and its biggg, mini garden, running track machine, comfy furniture and even a ktv room! i mean, the room itself can own my whole house. haha. its so beautiful& they have a golden retriever. damn cute:D

My uncle came forward to me and told me not to envy too much for everyone have their own fate and perhaps theirs just happen to be better than ours. At the same time, we should learn to cherish and be happy with what we have. i agree with him, and was trying really hard to push that feeling away. but my facial expression shows it all. i cant help but to display that Wow look. lol. sound like some gundu. haha.

but isn't life about being appreciative?(: well, to me it is.

i may envy, i may wish t have life like theirs

but its all just thoughts

&yes, definitely i embrace&appreciate the comfy-ness of my own house.

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HAPPY CNY

Me& Valerie
Me& Kelly

Sarah, Shirley, ME:D

okayy, i'm the elder sister there but apparantly i don't look like one. haha.

2nd day of CNY todayy. nothin special happen today tho. Angbaos collected is so much lesser than years before. but that don't really matter much. haha. umm, i'll be saving up my money for Oschool! As for vocals lesson, i wouldn give up the thought of going back, prolly one day i'll be back to it again. There is so much that i wish to learn, but so little time and capital to do so.

So anw, doin project on CNY. cool much? zzz. hardly even have time to rest.

sigh, i'm running out of words to say. will be backk sooon. bye.

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